pmsing?

Dance Inside by The All American Rejects is freakin' nice. (thanks sarah(:) im getting attuned to their music, which is a surprising realisation.

but the year so far has unveiled several surprising revelations about myself.

i used to go to sleep at night real early. now my general bedtime has become later, but the increase in my marginal productivity is abysmal, if not negative. nowadays my nights are full of introns; distractions in the form of windows media player, blogs and youtube. (basically the comp and the net.)
im gonna need to practice restraint before this swirls out of control; i wil not touch the comp until all my school work for the day is completed.

i need to take a firmer stand on my responsibilities at home without losing the trust and alliance of my sisters. like, im allowing lyna so much slack in terms of adherence to our tuition schedule that im seriously starting to question if my heart is really in it?

lyna is another one - i didn't know teenage girls could be sucha bloody frustration. but this has to improve. i have to help her do well for her o levels (or i'll forever carry the guilt) and i've gotta do it no matter how resistant she is, i need to counter that and not get dragged along in the turbulence. there's no such thing as trying; there's only doing and not doing.

yeah and then there's that little issue of my own As and SATs...

do i need to get tuition for math?

i'd bloody better not be a let down - there's only so much disappointment parents can handle. obviously disappointment in each other already overflowed, i dont need to hand them another platter to add to their menu for the everything-has-gone-wrong-in-my-life restaurant.